One of the biggest changes in the funeral business has been the move away from the more traditional format most Funerals take.
These days you can pretty much do anything you like and at Fuze Ceremonies we will help you create a ceremony that is as unique as the life you are celebrating.
The reasons why ‘My Way’ by Frank Sinatra, is one of the most popular pieces of funeral music is that people are doing exactly that. Most funerals now are created and conducted according to the culture, customs and language of the family. They are deeply personal.
What about planning the Ceremony yourself?
If you are planning the ceremony yourself, we recommend that you start by making a list of what you want to achieve: do you want it to be traditional and formal? innovative? informal? funny? What about traditions? Elements of ceremonial – military standard bearers ? What about dress code? Who will carry the coffin?
How would I go about constructing a ceremony?
Be prepared for the harsh reality that this will be a difficult thing to do. It may hurt to write a eulogy, and it also might be hard to read it. For some, that is the worst part.
The main Golden rule though is that all needs to be written down. You normally only have around 20 mins in a crematorium – so you need to think about that carefully. The next funeral will arrive on time. If its all written down you can keep an eye on timings, you can share it with others and you can ensure that they are happy with what is going to be said.
In times of grief, people can have a tendency to wander through memories that may not be acute, relevant or or well articulated. Sometimes people can move off track into a personal feelings or stories that are not necessarily appropriate.
Speaking at a funeral is a very difficult and challenging thing to do. We are happy to help you and do as much or as little as you wish us to. You’re in charge and we are only here to help you create and deliver the ceremony that reflects your wishes.
Is it okay to be funny?
Like any life, a ceremony will have highs and lows. Funny stories or jokes have a part to play but that’s not to say you will be trying to cover up the sadness. Its always good to include happy memories.
For many people humour and laughs can be a pivot point in a funeral. Especially when the deceased is someone who was known to have a good sense of humour. The ceremony doesn’t always have to be about the sadness or the loss. They can be about the funny memories, person, or stories.
In fact, some of the best laughs come by forcing people to remember who the person really was, versus strictly “glorifying” them. One of the best ways to use humour is through telling a story about something everyone can relate to. This can even be about something that was not among their best qualities.
What about Religious Funerals?
If you want a religious funeral ceremony, contact a faith leader who will normally have a format, a liturgy, which you will be able to personalise only to a certain extent.
Note about religious content – If you choose a celebrant from Fuze Ceremonies, we don’t restrict you, its up to you. Many of us have some religious cultural heritage and at times many people want some content (e.g. a hymn) as a reflection of this heritage without wanting a religious ceremony.