Our Broughty Ferry based Fuze Ceremonies Humanist Celebrant shares her passion for creating a last legacy through your ‘living eulogy’.

Talking about death and funeral wishes tends to feel like a bit of a taboo subject for many people.  This was certainly the case for me before I started on my journey to becoming a humanist celebrant with Fuze Ceremonies, feeling uncomfortable thinking about it or discussing it for myself or for loved ones.

Having a role as special as this means that we are in the position to have to gather information about loved ones who have passed away, from their nearest and dearest, at an emotional and often challenging time. Many families can share lots of information about their loved one, allowing us to create a beautiful personal tribute of their life.  For other families this can be trickier, with gaps in the timeline for a variety of reasons. Sadder still when there has been estrangement of family members.

In August this year, I had the absolute honour of conducting the Celebration of Life ceremony for my friend.  An incredible person who had already experienced very challenging circumstances, he was diagnosed with cancer and given months to live.  We sat together for hours at a time and he shared his life story with me.  I told him we would be doing ‘This is your life.’  It was the first time I had been part of a living eulogy and although emotional, it was an incredibly special experience.  The ceremony was created with his own words and memories, and a real sense of him came across on the day, his character, sense of humour and just what an incredible human he was.

This has had a profound impact on me and has made me more keen to record my own story and fill all the gaps that my children don’t know about me.  It has also led me to encourage others to tell their own stories or find out more from their loved ones. I have noticed lots of commercially available journals and notebooks designed for this very purpose.

A real focus on life stories, rather than focus on a sad ending.  This could be a lovely thing to do as an individual or to share with family members.

Perhaps this is the way forward.  It’s certainly something I would embrace as part of my Celebrant role.

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